Men In Skirts?

Well, it seems the fashion designers are once again unveiling a line of skirts for men. (From MackenzieImage – H&M’s Spring 2010 collection includes skirts & hosiery for men. That’s right, skirts and hosiery for men. Thoughts?  Supposedly, men will find skirts more comfortable than pants, but is that enough to get men to wear skirts?  There is still this double standard thing between the sexes that just doesn’t seem to want to go away.  You know, the one that says a man who is promiscuous is “a stud” and a woman who is promiscuous is “a slut” or “a whore.”  “Stud” carries a good connotation, the other two not so much.  The same double standard allows for women to dance with each other in public and still be seen as hetero, but not so men.  And women have been cross-dressing for years, decades even, and it is perfectly acceptable. Again, not so acceptable for men. 

But let us say that we have all evolved beyond that.  That it is perfectly okay for men to dress in what used to be seen as traditional women’s clothing.  A man can now wear a shirt, tie and skirt to work and no one will bat an eye.  Sounds great, doesn’t it?  ‘Til you know the truth of it!!

First off, is there a fly in these skirts?  If not, then how do men go about urinating?  Will we all have to bundle our skirts around our waists and “sit down” as the girls do?  Not having had a lifetime of learning to do that, I can envision a lot skirts with large wet spots in the back!   Will urinals become a thing of the past?  Or will we learn to lift up our skirt and tuck it under our chin whilst “doing our business?”  Here I envision the wet spots in the front!

And how about leg crossing?  Men have always crossed their legs with one ankle resting on the other knee.  Would women now be the ones checking out the “beaver shots?” Or would they be called “badger shots?”  Most women I know don’t even like it when men wear a short sleeved shirt and, when they raise their arms, give everyone in the line of sight a wonderful view of their hairy armpits!  I can’t imagine the uproar when a crossed leg reveals the tidy whiteys or, worse, the thong!!  Or worstest, commando!!

And just where would men put their stuff? You know, wallet, change, chapstick, pocket knife, hankerchief, cell phone and the like.  Are these “man-skirts” going to have pockets for all of this? Somehow, I get the feeling that putting pockets in their hot new designs would not set too well with fashion designers.  Pockets would probably “ruin the lines.”  So what do men do?  Do we wear one of those Scottish pouches in the front, a kind of throw-back fanny pack?  Those would make taking a leak even more difficult than I thought!  Do we all start carrying purses? 

Okay, this is where men draw the line! You may get us into a skirt but we are NOT going to start carrying purses.  It’s just too………. girly!


2 Responses

  1. Refreshing your knowledge, Tommy: Skirts are not female garment, they are males garment originally. How can they look girlish? That must be you our your kind of thinking!

    • Well, phyllis7, the times, they are a-changing. Actually, they have already changed and men wearing skirts, at least in America, is something that most people will look askance at. Ditto men carrying purses, although that practice seems to be gaining a toehold in some sectors. So I stand by my guns!!! Aside from all the other problems, men wearing skirts is just TOO GIRLISH!!

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